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lauraberesford9

Tuesday 21st April 2020

Not posted for a few days.


That's mainly because I'm just spending the days trying to keep my shit together....it's like having an eight year old toddler or a puppy (that tells you to shut the fuck up several times a day).


So far since lock down, George has:


  • Picked a big patch of paint off the recently decorated wall at the top of the stairs.

  • Chewed one of Harry's school books.

  • Ripped huge holes in both the safety netting and the mat on the trampoline.

  • Climbed over the fence to take a piss in next doors grid.

  • Ran out of the front door and around the green at the front of the house in just his undercrackers.

  • Threatened to shit in the bath EVERY TIME HE'S IN THERE because he thinks it's amusing.

  • Emptied all my £9-a-bottle shampoo and conditioner into the bath.

  • Blocked the toilet by flushing a smoothie carton.

  • Thrown a money box out of his bedroom window (that was bought for his christening) which smashed on the flags outside.

....and they're just the ones I can remember. We literally need eyes in the back of our heads.


I'm on my second large rum and Diet Coke of the evening...





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